You got a problem with that?

Howsabout living in NJ, just a few miles or a hundred to the south, where the concept of celebrity interaction goes one step, where a great deal of the stars come from, where there really are no paparazzi, where stars can mingle socially just like ordinary people, no big deal, no staring, no autographs, no crowding and mobbing, but no looking away either, where running into Bruce Springsteen at a supermarket is just like running into anyone else, maybe with a little conversation thrown in.

I've heard it said that the French consider Parisians rude, Russians consider Muscovites rude, etc. Perhaps something here for sociologist to study....:-)

I only spent one week in New York, but I didn't find anyone to be rude at all. In fact, everyone was extremely helpful and friendly. It's part of why I want to move up there. It feels like a being in a big family.

I am an UPSTATE New Yorker and have visited the city four times. Once for pleasure and three times for work. I never went anywhere alone. I met some strange and nice people during the pleasure trip and every time I went down with a group for work, something frightening would happen. Someone’s purse was stolen from our group every time right in the hotel and another time someone was being followed from our group as she was walking back to the hotel after shopping. And we always stayed in a ‘good’ part of the city. I would never wish that kind of chaos on anyone and would like to specify that not all of New York is like this. The city is only one small portion of New York State as a whole and many people don’t realize that. When people think New York, they think city. Not true at all. I love my country life where I can go outside and not be bombarded by hundreds of people. Where I can drive anywhere and not get stuck in a traffic jam. Children have lots of room to play and play in nature, not on concrete slabs surrounding by the continuous noise of the city. I can walk out my back door and take pictures of birds and various other wildlife and only hear the birds and nothing else. As for celebrities, they aren’t around here quite as much as in the city, but we’re still respectful. Where I work, I’ve passed by a celebrity on the street and talked to one on the phone. But if you are famous, you have to expect people to come up to you and want to talk. Otherwise, why did you want to become famous in the first place? To be recognized and adored, am I wrong? I feel it’s not right to hound a celebrity, but I don’t feel they deserve the same boundaries that ‘normal’ citizens do.

loved this article!!! as an ex-New Yorker i know exactly how it feels!

Everyone is entitled to an opinion. I was born and raised in New York, as were my parents. I think there is a hint of jealousy from non-New Yorkers that we, New Yorkers are up-front and honest people.

I lived for many years on a popular Greek Island. We too prided ourselves on many of the attributes that you ascribe to NYers. We went out of our way to treat any celebrity as any other person on holiday - that is treating them with politeness and courtesy that any visitor to your country deserves. Indeed sometimes I had dealings with "well known" people without even knowing it. I had a client who was a member of the French National Soccer team. I'm not French and I don't follow football. I only found out who he was because the French tourist behind him asked him for an autograph. I think your phenomona are something which applies to both very very large communities and very small ones. Especially in societies where cafe societies predominate.

Hi, I loved your article. I belong to the 1/3rd that you mention and have experienced most of what you have said. It is a great place to be whhether you are visiting, working, or even as a retiree. It has so much to offer. Sunanda

Wow. i cannot believe what i was reading; not only does it sound arrogant but it is on the silly side too. New Yorkers and the like are probably looking for happiness just like the rest of the populations. The main distinction is that they think they will get it faster in NY. Ha. A slower pace is what adds longevity to humans on this planet.

I loved the article....as an ex-New Yorker I am making copies and giving it to all my new acquaintances....it explains a lot of how New Yorkers and ex-New Yorkers think and  function.  

Wow. You are completely correct. i grew up in a small tiown. most people weren't noce.

I get what you are saying and agree with 90%. However, I must contend that I find New Yorkers to be much more polite and curtious than Bostonians or better yet MA as a whole. It is the most contentious & brutish atmosphere of any city/state of the union I have ever had the pleasure of living in or visiting! Fact!

A great article. Hailing from upstate New York as I do, and now living in southern California, I remember my vivid impressions of the few visits I was able to make to New York City. First of all, there's room for everyone. I cannot imagine a Los Angeleno stock broker in a $3000 suit easily sharing a park bench with a street person, but that's what I saw in Battery Park. And, as a Catholic priest in a Roman collar, I expect to be largely ignored walking around LA. Not so in the Big Apple - everybody seemed to say "Hi, Father!!" On the other hand, there was my aunt - a resident of Chicago and not readily intimidated - who spoke of having to live "aggressively" during the year her husband taught at Columbia.

Give me a break. New Yorkers and inhabitants of Northern cities in general need to get over themselves. I really could care less what someone in NY thinks. I live in the South and people here are quite happy living as they do. As a matter of fact if it is so wonderful in NY and other northern cities why are they all moving down here? You don't see anyone from here dying to move up north.

I am a misplaced New Yorker, and you put a big smile on my face.

Thanks very much for this article. I'm a wandering New Yorker and could never understand why people were so shocked by my ability to chat up strangers anywhere. Your article explains it all. It also makes me miss New York!

This piece is incredibly provincial. Not only are New Yorkers rude, but people in all the major cities in the Eastern Seaboard (Boston, Philadelphia, D.C., Baltimore, Miami) are. While New York is a mentally stimulating place, New York lags many other American cities in literacy rates and the percentage of its population that has college degrees. More immigrants move to the L.A. area each year than New York City.

That's right, everybody else is just jealous! Also, New York's mom said it was the coolest city in school!

Im originally from San Diego, moved to NY for almost 3 years. Im back to LA now for personal reasons. I will give anything to move back, I love NY so much that Ive cried when I think about it. The article was incredible and totally agree with it.

The rudest people in America live in Los Angeles. The smartest people in America live in Portland. The best looking people in America live in Salt Lake City. And I hate to tell you this, but New Yorkers are hicks. You guys are about three to five years behind the rest of the country, yet you seem to spend a lot of time trying to convince yourselves that you're not.

Lovely article. I'm currently studying in San Diego, and I can't wait to get back to the city. My time away has really helped me appreciate the great things that are so unique to NYC. @Mac NYC has a longer life expectancy than the rest of the country. http://www.nyc.gov/html/doh/html/press_archive03/pr037-0421.shtml The press release is from the city... so take it with a grain of salt. @DB http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9404E7DE143EF935A2575BC0A9609C8B63 From the article: Almost 5 million people over the age of 25 in the New York metropolitan area -- more than a third of the region's population -- had at least a bachelor's degree in 2005, according to the latest data from the Census Bureau. In Manhattan, nearly three out of five residents were college graduates and one out of four had advanced degrees, forming one of the highest concentrations of highly educated people in any American city.

If N.Y is so wonderful, why do we have so darn many NYers moving here to N.C.? We find them to be rude know-it-alls, and, frankly, we wish they would go back to N.Y.!

Or maybe, they just watch less television than anyone else, so they don't see people acting like they do on tv.

"Everyone is entitled to an opinion. I was born and raised in New York, as were my parents. I think there is a hint of jealousy from non-New Yorkers that we, New Yorkers are up-front and honest people." Mara, you are absolutely right. I am not a New Yorker but having visited the city a few times, I have to say I envy how up front they are. In a place where I live we mask our passive aggressiveness with an artificial politeness.

I am a transplanted NYer who now lives in the L.A. area. I wanted to add a few thoughts: --Not a week goes by that I don't meet some one from NY who moved here. --In my 40 years in NYC I don't think I met one person who moved to New York from L.A. --My wife saw a clip on TV of people in China cramped into a subway car and said "How can people live like that?" I replied "That is the way I went to work for more than 20 years." (I was not kidding).

One could argue the lack of filters in one's style of communication would equal a less intelligent individual; however, being from Seattle and recently moving to Manhattan, I have started to find this type of interaction refreshing. Feelings seem to be hurt less and the passive aggression you find in the west seems to be less... There definitely are rude New Yorkers, but I wouldn't say anymore than elsewhere throughout the country... they will just admit they are rude here (and not care).

A view from abroad: I'm Irish and I've visited New York a number of times and have not found the indigenous population to be rude. On the contrary, I have found the bulk of New Yorkers with whom I've interacted to be urbane and engaging and welcoming where appropriate. Perhaps as a contrast, and I apologise for trading in stereotype but space is limited, I find artifice of the mid-western hyper smiling type entirely unsettling.

After reading the first paragraph, I hoped this article was tongue-in-cheek. When I finished it, I was disappointed the Smithsonian would print such drivel. Frankly, I even felt a little badly for any sound-thinking New Yorkers, who surely were embarrassed by this banal and ill-conceived love note from one of its (apparently) recent émigrés. Was the article mistakenly printed in Smithsonian instead of its target publication—you know, the one they hand out on the double deck bus tours of New York? Indeed, there are many exceptional things about New York City; it truly is a great city. But the author’s ill-conceived logic and tortured sociological concepts betrays anything that approaches describing the uniqueness and vitality of New York—or anything that makes it a great city. Who, excepting a disillusioned few NYC denizens would give any credence to the pathetic concept of New York City dwellers as being more intelligent than others? There are regions that are more highly educated such as San Francisco, Boston, and North Carolina’s research triangle (Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill). There are cities that are more ethnically diverse (San Francisco, Los Angeles, Seattle). There are cities that are more charming and places where people seem more helpful, outgoing, etc.). The author not only missed the point about what it is that makes New York City a truly great place but she further masked it (and its population’s) unique qualities with these simplistic and misinformed concepts. The result was a pathetically provincial article that certainly did justice neither to New York nor the Smithsonian. Fortunately, for any loyal New Yorkers, it was clear the article was not written by a New Yorker. Even more so, shame on the editors for filling print space with this piece!

Oh, yeah, New Yorkers are real smart. If you don't believe it, just ask them! They're smart, but obviously not smart enough to find their way across the Hudson River and find some clean air to breathe, some sod to walk upon, and some free space where they're not rubbing elbows with everybody else. "But, oh," they say, "we have so many things that you hicks in the sticks don't have, like the theater." (They pronounce it "the-a-tah.") Yeah, well, how many times in the the last twenty years has the average New Yorker been to the "the-a-tah?" And it must have been fun riding the dirty smelly subway with all the perverts and crackheads to get to the "the-a-tah." Some New Yorkers do eventually wise up and discover that there is a great country beyond the western border of New Jersey. For those who do come to that realization, please do me a couple of favors. First, leave your New York attitudes at the state line. Second, don't freak out when you see me carrying a sidearm. It's just the way we do things in most of the western states. We have a tradition called "exercising our rights under the Second Amendment to the Constitution." If you don't like it, you're welcome to move on to California.

The problem with New York City is volume: Too many people in much too small, compartmentalized spaces. This leads to rudeness and agression as described by the great Joan Acocella in her thoughtful and provocative little essay on a much discussed but little analyzed topic. I love the City and would, in an instant, live there again if I could afford the space required for a decent apartment and a weekend escape.

Not to mention that New Yorkers are preselected for narcissism...

It may come as a surprise to New Yorkers, but Midwesterners are pleasant and polite becasue they are pleasant and polite people and are not so because "public behavior is ruled by a kind of compulsory cheer that people probably picked up from television and advertising." Many are also of "higher energy and ambition."

Dear Joan Acocella, a marvellous article, thanks. For an outsider, some insights. You humanised the city so convincingly. They say that when a New Yorker prays, God replies: "Ya talkin' ta me?". Now I know that God then says, "Listen, this is what ya gotta do ..."

I remember discovering long ago that in NY when you walk into a shop and the clerk says, "Whaddya want?" it simple means "What do you want?". I always enjoy visiting.

New Yorkers are always on the move, always got somewhere to go or something to do. Some out of towners confuse this with being rude. And generally NYers will stop and help anyone out--except the occasional obnoxious moron or complete idiot. Who has patience for that :)

I grew up in Atlanta (and FYI with many "out-in-the-country relatives"). And after college moved to north Jersey and have lived here for over 20 years. I never really thought of New Yorkers as being rude. It's more they just "compress the time" spent on something. Anyone who has lived in the southeast, knows that southerners also really get into others business and like to help. I just think that New Yorkers (and frequently North Jerseyans) just do it faster and like to help and "get it done" without a lot of time wasting. So...sometimes you feel rushed and in fact you are being rushed. The comment about mothers was a good - New Yorkers aren't the "Tender-soft-comfort" Moms they're the "Did you brush your teeth-Your sneakers are by the front door-If we don't leave now you'll be late" Moms. By the way, I miss the south (and do love it). But New York is great and love it too!

I rarely come across a person that was born and raised in NYC, especially in Manhattan. I find that most people move to NYC to get away from what they perceived as a boring life elsewhere or from places where their lifestyles were not accepted. So, you have groups of people that want to identify with a new place and look to shun their old identity. I get the greatest kick out of asking people where they came from originally and see the look of annoyance on their face; like they've been found out. Oddly, I think the reason NYers may have a side of warmth to them is in fact because they are not REALLY NYers at all! They are essentially tourists that never left. The born-and-bread NYers have a patina that others see as rude that is really a "cut through the BS" attitude. Like most people, they too have have a biased pride in the place where they live.

I have no problem with someone rah-rahing their home town. Those who enjoy it should say so. And those who have to live there for economic reasons, but don't enjoy it should make the best of a bad deal. My home town is great too. I'm glad leadership of the country is moving South, and at the same time spreading out from the limited pool of NYC, which as the author says is made up, in a large part, of people who haven't transitioned fully to becoming Americans. The author makes the traditional and solid arguement that immigrants are a self-chosen elite. OTOH, one might liken living in NYC to taking a tour group of Europe. 1)There is a lot of Euros there so the Irishmen are happy. 2) More importantly, in a tour group, you give the company money, and everything is taken care of for you, no skills required. If you live in a small town, or the country, you might have to figure out how to do the plumbing (and not just bug the landlord), or the lawn, or climb on the roof to sweep off the black walnuts, or even make a meal. In a big city, you can hire all these jobs. The landlord will plumb, the illegal immigrant will trim your flowers, you can get Chinese take-out, and drop your laundry off at a service more easily. All you need is 1)One marketable skill 2)A bit of street savvy. 3)A check-writing pen and you can make it in NY. In the rest of the country, it takes a bit more skill. And unlike New Yawkers who think the only oxygen is on their side of the Hudson, I think this arrangement is just fine. And in fact, I'd like to visit NYC some day. I'm sure it will be great, too. See the Lady, and the ESB, and the Yankees...I'm sure I could spend many a happy hour wandering the streets looking at the architecture. But I'd be glad to return home to where the grass ranges from really green to eye-hurting green, and possums outnumber people. I'd tell you all where it is, but we don't have enough room for the stampede of New Yawkers that would cause.

Leave it to the intelligent people to inform the rest of us how intelligent they really are! Most of the actions stated in this article are behaviors. Many of these behaviors are considered unacceptable in most other states and many cultures. But, these behaviors are OK because it is a New Yorker they belong to. It is fairly simple. Behavior does not equal intelligence. Etiquette, or lack of, does not equal intelligence. Please do the remainder of the country, and the rest of the state of New York, a favor and keep all the intelligent people in the city. We are truly happy you have found your place in the world. The most important thing is that your happy place is not near the rest of us. The next time I meet a real New Yorker I will be sure to ask where they are really from!

Another example of new yorkers trying to justify why they're rude and obnoxious.

Why do New Yorkers seem rude? Maybe it's because they are. But I guess living surrounded by walls of concrete and constant noise would make even the nicest person rude. In New York they call it "The City." In the rest of the country they would call it "The Prison."

I would like to share my story with you since at is about New Yourk city. me coming from a forein country in 1983 for the first time out of saudi arabia it was a big culture shock. I had many bad experience in New Yourk city but I want to share one thing happen tp me. The first morning befor I venture out to New Yourk city streets I asked the girl at the front desk in the hotel for a street map and the hotel adress. she was generous and gave me a postal card where it shows the stareet and the hotel picture. so I went out roaming aroung.The first shop I stopped I so a stand with a postal cards so I look them one by one it happens that I saw the one the girl gave me at the hotel which I took out of my pocket and compared the tow. then I put mine in my pucket and the shops back in the stand and walked away....after tow or three minutes walk ....tow powerfull black hands graped my neck ....this huge black guy was shouting profane words. he tore my pocket and tooke my postal crad which the girl gave me at the hotel He thoght I stole it from hes shop...I think I have bad luck with New Yourk city.

I'm a New Yorker, born and raised, as many of you seem to claim don't exist. I was taught the difference between right and wrong, and being polite and rude, and I happily take those behaviors with me wherever I may go. However, all bets are off in NY. With the amount of people, you have to be more proactive in order to get by. To get through the subway turnstalls, to walk down the street, to catch the elevator. Aiming to achieve those things is not rude by any means. I have taken off my headphones because a tourist has asked for help, and I have gladly advised. This article nails it - we have a different persona to us, but we have the innate ability to be compassionate. We just have other agenda to take care of simultaneously. A lot of posters seems to think this is the time to bash NYC, but let's look at where this negativity is coming from. North Carolina? People head there because it's cheap (which is correlated to the fact that few people have wanted to live there in the past). Hicks? How can you ever say that about NYC? No one wants to move here? Half my college friends were from the south. I like to consider myself a kind person, but truth be told, I spend my day working with tried and true intelligent New Yorkers, and all the idiot comments come from visitors. Maybe intelligence is not connected to this "behavior" of brashness, but at least we seem to have figured something out.

I've always thought that New York just has a different version of polite behavior than, say, the South, where I live now. In NYC,by and large, the most polite thing to do in any circumstance is not waste someone's time. You get right to the point and then get out of their way. In the South, by and large, the most polite thing to do in any circumstance is make the other person/people you are dealing with comfortable....

First of all, that was a fantastic article. Secondly, another thing that I love about NYers is that they couldn't care less about all of the people who hate them for being NYers. Note the lack of response that all of the hate messages are getting. If someone wrote an article discussing the many virtues of Southerners or Californians, do you think a bunch of NYers would get all upset and feel the need to tear down all Southerners and ignore the article's good points. My guess is probably not. If NY isn't for you, no one is forcing you to visit or read articles about it.

Being from Minnesota, the East coast was a bit of a shocker to me when I arrived there to sell magazines door-to-door, and on street corners, when I was 20 years old. I expected New Yorkers to be bold, brash, rude, insensitve and mean. On a couple of those points, I was right on the money, but for the most part I found New York to be utterly delightful. Even though I was engaged in one of the most annoying occupations on the planet, people were nearly unfailingly good-natured and accepting. I was stunned by it, and I carry that memory with me even today, nearly 20 years later... Boston, on the other hand, is a place that I will never step foot in again as long as I live...

In the words of Bob Dylan: "I'm going back to New York City, I do believe that I've had enough."

I read both the Smithsonian and The New York Times and I can't imagine why you would run this article in the Smithsonian UNLESS your subscriber base from NY is large. It has very little interest for me, a Midwesterner. Who cares?

I have lived in NYC for close to 30 years now. I think Ms. Acocella has a lot of valid things to say about the collective personality of people here in NYC being a result of living much more in the public eye. But I do think that failing to recognize that many people here in NYC can be very rude is a little bit of wishful thinking. Perhaps Ms. Acocella has never encountered someone trying to take her taxicab, or cutting into a line without anyone speaking up, or butting into you in the subway without reason, or cutting directly in front of you on the sidewalk in order to get where they are going one millisecond faster. Perhaps Ms. Acocella has never read the name calling and racist comments consistently filling website comment sections of less erudite publications like NYC's tabloid publications. Perhaps Ms. Acocella has never looked into people who don't tip cab drivers or don't even pay the full fare. There's a lot to like about NYC and New Yorkers, but working around daily rudenesses is a big part of my life. Perhaps Ms. Acocella's point is simply that in the midst of the great amount of rudeness fueling this city there is cause to celebrate the kindnesses that do also surface.

While I'd love to be able to visit the outstanding cultural attractions New York offers, I'm just too scared to try because of the reputation for violence the city has. I'm a little old granny and not about to risk being mugged or shot. I love to travel and do it frequently, but unless I could be in a safe group, I'd avoid New York. Besides, we West Coasters have the sense to live at a slower pace than those in the cement forest of the east. .

Congratulations to those who had the courage to try and be the best of the best in New York City. You truly deserve recognition for your perseverance. You made our New York City beyond comparison to any other city in the USA and maybe the world. It is the heartbeat of America, full of life, and exceptional people.

I LIVE IN NEW JERSEY BUT WHEN I MEET SOMEONE WHO ASKS WHERE IM FROM OR LIVE ? I TELL THEM.I LIVE IN NEW JERSEY ON THE JERSEY SHORE BUT IM ALSO 55 MINUTES FROM MANHATTAN, 55 MINUTES FROM PHILLY ,AND 55 MINUTES FROM ATLANTIC CITY...BUT THE BEST ROADWAY SIGN IN THE TRI-STATE AREA IS ON THE BELT PARKWAY IN BROOKLYN..AND THE SIGN READS .... ''FUGGETABOUTIT'' LONG LIVE NEW YORK

I am from Dallas,Texas and I found New York to be a friendly place. Southerners are friendly justfrom the teeth out. They don't mean a word of it. They are just mannerly. So being a Southerner, New Yorkers honesty would drive me crazy. I feel like I have to get away from people like that and quick. I like all our manners and put on. It makes me comforable because I really don't have to share myself with anyone. Scherrie

In the subway or on the sidewalk, when someone asks a passerby for directions, other people, overhearing, may hover nearby, disappointed that they were not the ones asked, and waiting to see if maybe they can get a word in. *dances* *points* That! Yes! That!! I love my city.

I lived in NYC in the early 90s, but grew up in Iowa. I have always found New Yorkers to be, on the whole, more friendly than Iowans. New Yorkers are used to strangeness and more tolerant of oddities (and oddballs), while Iowans tend to be suspicious of outsiders. After NYC, I moved to Philadelphia where people are really rude (but, oddly, in a lovable sort of way).

This was a very nice article. I do beg to differ on the point of this being exclusive behavior belonging to New Yorkers only. I am from the Detroit Pontiac area of MI. The people here are much the same as you described New Yorkers. There are those who will let you know their opinions on how to do something (public child rearing, parking, driving, ect), this can become annoying, sometimes helpful/rude. Then there are those who are happy to help with directions, discussions of Movies, Resturants, Schooling, Sports, ect. Just the other day a good sized group of us were waiting to be seen, when someone saw another with a gardening mag, & started talking to them. A few min later, there was one group talking about gardening, another talking about boating, and another talking about something else. When numbers were called, people where reluctant to leave these small groups. I have had the oportunity to travel to other states & cities. I find that most people are friendly & helpful. Instead of being a specific intelligence, or environment, couldn't it just be good ole fashioned social behavior to connect to those near you?

I visited New York twice in the eighties, I loved parts of the city. Central Park was really nice when I went during the day on a weekend. i still remember the little girl in her Sunday best all dressed in white down to her ruffled lace socks and shiny black shoes. Everyone seemed so relaxed and comfortable. Contrary to this article,I found the behavior of New Yorkers rude and sometimes down right frightening even during the day. I still remember TRYING to buy a simple hot dog for my daughter and I at a street vendor. Two women in front of us could not/would not make up their minds and stepped to the side. Thinking that meant (as it does in the Midwest "go ahead"), I stepped forward to place my order and had both of them snarl at me. So I stepped back and let them go ahead. Here, we say "excuse me, but I was just about to order politely'. I did not find most of the people I met helpful, friendly, or even interested. I found the publc bathrooms, and even the department store bathrooms absolutely filthy with water standing on the floor. I went to a bar and a fellow Minnesotan who worked there let me use theirs. A group of teenagers surrounded my daughter at a fast food place, and just as I was getting really alarmed, they started talking to her about Prince and things calmed down. No even though there is a lot to love about New York, I would not live there if you paid me.

Fascinating. I've never been to New York, but the article made it seem so real. It was so interesting that the anecdotes listed to show how New Yorkers are different from other U.S. people were both about people wanting to butt in and HELP each other. I'd always fallen for the "New Yorkers are so rude" stereotype - and now I realise that it is the SAME stereotype as the "People from the north of England are so rude" statement that people from the south of England make. Lets start an immediate "New York / Yorkshire" exchange program(me) ! It sounds like we both think of other people as interesting folks to ENJOY the company of. We can have a good time trading insults and helping each other out, and leave the insular selfish types to treat each other as faceless nonentities to be ignored or dismissed with bland politeness. "You can always tell a Yorkshireman - but you can't tell him much! Chris, Sheffield, Yorkshire, Northern England

View from London: I wonder if anyone can tell me why it was that when I visited NYC, on several occasions, people (in Manhattan) would hear me talking to my sister and on hearing my English accent would ask where I was from and which I preferred, "London or New York". I couldn't understand this obsessive questioning and found it awkward eventually to think of plausible and polite responses. I do choose to live in London, and not New York so what is there to say? But more to the point, nobody has ever asked me in Berlin, Paris, Antwerp, Istanbul, Cairo, Athens, Jerusalem or Warsaw whether I preferred these cities to London. I genuinely really liked New York and the main thing that put me off was this self-consciousness about the city. That struck me as so suburban. They did not behave in any way like this in San Fransisco. There is a lack of dignity in continually pestering people to like you which does not sit well with anyone. I think that is the quality that has annoyed people in this article. Apart from the impression that they are overly anxious to be liked, New Yorkers are likable, and not noticeably ruder or more intelligent, harder working, privileged, or anything else, than the rest of humanity.

A very good article, i can compare it to any metro in India too. Especially Mumbai is not so different than New york.

I live in San Francisco. I grew up just outside of NYC. I used to live in LA. In LA, the people say, "Have a nice day!" when they really mean - Drop dead. In NY, the people say, "Drop dead!" when they really mean HAVE A NICE DAY. Some memories: I taught middle school here in CA for years. My students were mesmerized by my accent (I still have one after 40 years) which I could turn on and off at will (Ms. Zacconi, say PAUL." I would make it two syllables - PAW ULL, right? My "attitude" (in your face with a smile) and my stories of having grown up in the "projects" were met with delight and curiosity. AND being half-Sicilian, I had it made!! Eh, watzamattafuyouse? The NY "mystique" here in the bay area (especially among 12 - 14 year olds) is wonderful. The article was right on, by the way. New Yawkuz are great. What fun!

This article could have also been describing Israel! Same behaviour! And I lived and worked in New York City!

I live just 35 minutes from Grand Central Terminal. While the article gets at the communal nature of city (which I have experiencede and regular participate in), a followup article on the driving habits in New York might reveal other qualities of the character of its denizens. A real interesting transformation occurs when you put New Yorkers behind the wheel of a car.

It's unseemly to congratulate oneself for smug self-satisfaction and inflated income. So, New Yorkers tell themselves that what they are seeing is 'intelligence and refinement'. They also think they have the best sports teams in the world. There's no end to New Yorkers' capacity for self-delusion. For all the pretense, it's the most provincial and thin-skinned city on the planet.

And who are these people who believe New Yorkers are smarter? If they were, they wouldn't have moved to an urban cesspool, where they could live packed on top of one another like rabbits in a warren, and pay idiotically inflated prices for everything. Smarter people live in the country, where they can raise their children around decent people with morals, instead of people who walk right by somebody being raped or murdered and don't even bother to dial 911 -- and lack the courage or principles to step in and try to stop it.

NYC has is quite a tough place to live. Visiting is great, but actually sticking around and dealing with the expensive cost of living can really drive you nuts. I didn't last a month there because I couldn't deal with living in a room the size of the box that cost $700 a month. Another thing that gets me about the city is the sink or swim attitude I encountered in the workplace. It felt like employers could care less about you there. A little piece of advice for anyone considering moving to NYC: DON'T WORK IN THE SCHOOL SYSTEM! It truly stinks.

It's funny that people from New York State think New York City is part of their state. Wrong, friends ... New York City is its own place. North New Jersey, Long Island, Southwest Connecticut, and Westchester County is the "state" where New York City resides, not upstate New York. Someone from Albany is as at home in the NYC metro area as somebody from Montana.

This article provided a very interesting perspective on why NY'ers are the way we are. I always find it amusing when you have a bunch of southerners and midwesters bashing NYC for the exact reasons we love it here. You can have the cultural wasteland you call civilization and we will stay here in the greatest city on earth while you raise your inbred children to be close-minded conformists with nothing to offer. And despite the fact that you are generally useless humans, we will still give you directions when you come to our city to visit and ask vacuous questions like "where is the empire state building" while you are standing right next to it. And as for rightwingprof who says NY'ers dont have courage or principles, clearly sir, you were not here on 9/11 to see what courage really is. Also perhaps you should get your ideas about violence in NYC right. It's not even in the top 10 most dangerous cities and hasnt been for years. In fact most of those cities are in, you guessed it, the South and Midwest 1. Detroit, Michigan 2. St. Louis, Missouri 3. Flint, Michigan 4. Oakland, California 5. Camden, New Jersey 6. Birmingham, Alabama 7. North Charleston, South Carolina 8. Memphis, Tennessee 9. Richmond, California 10. Cleveland, Ohio And as for friendliness, I find the South to be downright fake, because you know people aren't truly that friendly, they are just putting on affectations and none of it is sincere. I find that to be more offensive then anything. Basically, everyone else has an inferiority complex when it comes to NYC, and really, no article is needed to tell anyone why it is the best (In America anyway), because it truly needs no defending. Our city speaks for itself.

Joan's article reflects what I would call urban-centrism, a kind of superiority complex partly born from the need to justify why one lives in a big city. It would be dangerous to assert anything except that all of us rural and small-town dwellers wish we were smart enough to live in New York, the apex of the geographical hierarchy of human existence. And be sure to marvel that she didn't lose bladder control while riding the elevator with Sir Paul.

Glamourized, glitzed, in a million films, with pre selected images of New York and New Yorkers, we visited for the first time with our heads filled images from Sex and the City. After having lived my 50 plus years in Northern California, we came to New York City. Others have told me from their recollections prior to Guilianni, excrements strewn streets in Time Square, people yelling at you if you weren't walking fast enough or in the right direction, cab drivers that would cuss you out in banged up cabs, urine smelling subway stations, people sleeping on not just he curbs or doorway, but smack in the middle of the walkway, getting mugged any time of the day in Central Park and hold onto your handbags tight, ladies. We didn't see or experience any of this in our week long visit this summer. It was magical. The people were nice, made eye contact, not hurried, repeated themselves politely when we couldn't understand the thick New York accent. Intelligence? Smarter? in their own right about their own place about their opinions, perhaps, but "book" intelligences usually means no social interaction, nerdy engineers of the silicon valley, glued to their computers. New York isn't saturated with nerdy intelligence, but "street" practical experience and knowledge and hey, I'd like to hear from them and learn a thing or two. Mrs. C

@KTC: I am a one of the "generally useless" humans who have visited and basked in the glory of New York City. Full disclosure: I hated--HATED--NYC because of the Yankees and what they had done to my beloved Royals in the ALCS for three years running. I swore never to visit such a mean place, where baseball teams could absolutely shatter a Midwestern kid's dreams. Years passed and I soon became tired of Midwestern myopia, and moved to Seattle, which, as almost any New Yorker can tell you, ain't even remotely New York. I then met a marvelous woman from New York and paid the requisite visit to her family. To say I was dumbstruck would be too gentle; I was in awe. The people? Sure, they're know-it-alls, but tell me, exactly what city doesn't have its share of them? Rude? With New Yorkers, everything is a transaction, to be executed as swiftly and effortlessly as possible; if there's a problem, they'll let you know. If it's rude, eh, it's rude. I found it kinda cool. I've taken up enough space, but to the point: I love this city. But I also love where I'm from and where I live, and that's all we can really strive for, right?

I, too, am a former New Yorker. But I've lived in New Mexico since 1976. Talk about culture shock. My dad always says NY is like a small town (we lived in the Bronx). You knew your neighbors, the grocery store clerk, the candy/pizza store clerk, and I lived within walking distance of all of my friends. I was outside all the time with my friends (when I wasn't in school or sleeping). Because of this, everyone knew everyone (pretty much), but we weren't rude to each other or to anyone else. When people in New Mexico tell me they think New Yorkers are rude, I know they don't understand the culture back there. The culture here in NM is so very different, as well as the intelligence. The other day in the grocery store, I was waiting at the deli counter to order some sliced cheese. After 20 minutes, a man who walked up to the counter not five minutes earlier was waited on before me. I spoke up and told the clerk I had been there waiting for 20 minutes and the man who interrupted got really angry. I explained how long I had been waiting but he chose to ignore what I said. I didn't do anything wrong, but was chastised for it. Talk about rude! No, New Yorkers are not rude. They are helpful people who just happen to care about others as well as themselves. The cultural differences probably spilled over from when our ancestors came over from Russia, Poland, Italy, etc... Good article.

That was a fantastic piece! It was both touching and accurate. As a new official New Yorker, I do agree with your assessment regarding their behavior in private is the same as their behavior in public on the superficial level. How else can you explain the saying, "the city that loves you back."

Interesting article. Generally, the people that I have met while I was in New York were very friendly. New Yorkers are highly educated, very direct, and to the point. However, they are not very patient, and perceive any lack of knowledge as a lack of intelligence. They also have a tendancy to ridicule anything that is outside of their culture. I grew up in the South, and I know a number of folks from North Carolina that lack a college education, yet have more common sense than a lot of New Yorkers I have met. I could drop these people off in the middle of nowhere and they could survive without any assistance for years. Do that to a group of New Yorkers, and they couldn't last a day, let alone a couple of hours. Would that mean they are more intelligent than the New Yorkers, given that scenario? No, they just possess the skills and knowledge to survive in the country. While I agree there is a different culture in New York than in most parts of the country, New York culture doesn't necessarily make New Yorkers any more intelligent. New York is an exciting city, but underneath all of that flash and excitement, New Yorkers are just the same as anyone else.

I have no problem with someone exercising their freedom of speech, but has this lady been to Los Angeles? Let's talk about rude and let's understand the meaning of rude when we choose to use that word. I'm a New Yorker and yes, we speak our minds because the truth is where we live and breathe and if people can't take it, then they are going to be very unhappy. New York is the only place in the world where 911 could take place and the city pulled together in a way that Hollywood wishes it could replicate. Trust, if that had happened in Los Angeles, it would have been a case of Katrina all over again and all of you know exactly what I'm saying. New york is the center of what the whole world wishes it could be. It is the pulse and the curve of what everyone goes by when they think of success, making it and everything that is fabulous bar none. New Yorkers have no time for foolishness, games or nonsense. Most foreigners choose to move to New York because it is one of the few cities in America, let alone the world, where they can get some real sense of home and not a mere glimmer which so many cities unfortunately have to fake the funk in order to claim they have a community. When everyone else whines and complains about how New Yorkers are, we simply brush our shoulders off and keep it moving. At the end of the day, don't hate the player, get out of the game and keep it moving. There are plenty of sappy wannabee cities like Los Angeles, where you can fake the funk all day long, give yourself a false makeover, eat yogurt and only dream of the day when you can see a real Broadway play. Or better yet, complain about why you can't get a meal past 9:00pm and why no one delivers. When you crave that next canole or gray's papaya I'll bet you'll be buying a ticket to New York real soon.

I was born in Manhattan and lived my first 38 years in Queens.I went to school there, and as an adult, worked in Manhattan. Then I got married and moved to Northern Westchester.The difference in manners and behavior was striking.People held doors for others, said "good morning" plus my neighbors were very courteous and minded their own business. That was very refreshing. It was much more pleasant than what I was used to. I suppose if one thrives on the highly competitive atmosphere and really needs and can afford, the various cultural resources the city offers, fine, to each their own. As for me, give me the distant suburbs or the country any day. "Feh" to the crowds, hustle, bustle and yes, rudeness of a city, any city.

I think the rudeness factor is even simpler (as a resident). As a visitor, it is too easy to forget that you are in a city that houses 8.5 million residents and several million daytime workers from New Jersey, Connecticut, and Westchester County. Of course, New York is busy and you see many people, but it's so tourist-friendly that, in many ways, you can forget that your actions are directly interfering with those of residents. There are 8.5 million of us sharing 300 square miles. We have the same responsiblities as everyone else in the nation -- We have to pick up our kids at school, we have to run to the bank, we have to go to Target to pick up medicine. The problem is that with so many people and so much traffic, it just takes LONGER to do all of these things. (Example: I want to go to my local Chase Bank to deposit a check. I have to walk or take a bus 12 blocks. Including the wait time for an ATM and the travel time, I spend nearly an hour on this project. Upstate (where I'm from), with a car, I could do it in 10-15 minutes, even with a much further distance.) So, we get upset when people get in our path. Listen, I love the fact you're visiting (and WE hope you have a great time!), but must you stop directly at the top of the stairs with your subway map? Must you stop suddenly in the middle of the sidewalk to snap that photo? This is when you will encounter the rude New Yorker. Joan -- I agree with you regarding askign someone for directions. New Yorkers are almost achingly helpful, just have some common sense and keep in mind that we still have to do what we have to do, even when you're on vacation :)

This was amusing. So, NYers are just misunderstood by everyone, eh? Riiiight. It's very NY to blame their lack of common courtesy on the evils of manners propagated by "advertising" or "TV" (ironically, both industries based heavily out of NY) rather than taking responsibility. It's not that we want people running around with fake smiles on, which is what NYers think of my hometown of LA (that's an easy way of showing a Californian that you've never been there). The same type of courtesy and manners are nearly universal in the western world and few NYers have them. Saying "whaddya want" or "gimme a cwafee" is just rude. Period. I'm sorry that you pay $1800 for a shoebox, your buses and trains are dirtier and older than everyone else's and you have 6 trees, but you chose that life. Don't take it out on me. I chose it too--for awhile--and I still remember my please and thank yous. I don't buy the bank story for a minute; in fact, one of the things that annoys me about NY is the sense of entitlement. It seems everyone in Manhattan thinks s/he is the most important person on the street. Nary a post office or bank (more the former; who goes into a bank these days?) visit goes by when someone doesn't shove in front of me or forget to ask the teller something and tries to yell over the conversation taking place. I often wonder if these people had parents. At least the Mom in this story said excuse me. That's a phrase you'll never hear in NYC.

I was in NY seven years ago, and the people were helpful. Today? Many, no. Even though I am a tourist, I love the fast paced hustle and bustle, and feel the same way about the tourists who are standing or moving like a snail. Again, even though I am a tourist, I move through the city like a local, or at least try my best. What I can't stand about many New Yorkers, is their lack of just talking. You are on the subway, or standing in line, and you try to make friendly smal talk while you're waiting, and almost everytime I get ignored, or the f-off look/attitude. True, people seven years ago were willing to help, but in my visit here this time, it is almost almost non-existent. Believe me, I love the no nonsense attitude, as you mentioned in your article, because in California, where I live, you wouldn't dare correct someone for cutting in line. You would get chewed out, or people would look at you as if you are not being tolerant, or politically correct, and not just by the person who cut. That's what I love about NY and the East Coast...PC seems to not exist, just tell you as it is. I just can't stand the rudeness in everyday communication - at a store, in a line, etc... I know there are nice New Yorkers who show common politeness and courtesy, but they're hard to find.

Well, there you go, telling O. Henry's "The Heart of the City" all over again, in your own way of course. You better face it, Ms. Acocella, you can really write.