Ten Notable Apocalypses That (Obviously) Didn’t Happen
Apocalyptic predictions are nothing new—they have been around for millennia
- By Mark Strauss
- Smithsonian.com, November 12, 2009, Subscribe
(Page 2 of 3)
6. Finding Omens in the Great Pyramid of Giza
A.D. 1881 was a banner year for apocalyptic expectations. For starters, there was the prediction of “Mother Shipton,” a 16th-century British soothsayer whose prophecies were first published in 1641. A later edition, published in 1862, included the prediction: “The world to an end shall come; in eighteen hundred and eighty one.” However, the book’s author, Charles Hindley, admitted that this and other prophecies (including the invention of the telegraph and the steam engine) were added as a hoax in an apparent attempt to boost book sales.
Writing in an 1881 edition of Harper’s Magazine, an unnamed author lamented, “I fear it will be impossible… to deliver the English masses from this unhappy piece of miseducation.” However, on a more hopeful note, the article added: “I am assured by friends of mine employed in the British Museum that for months that institution has been fairly besieged by people anxious to know if there be any such manuscript as that referred to, or if the predictions are genuine.” Nonetheless, the 1911 edition of Encyclopaedia Britannica noted that the 1881 end-of-the-world prophecy was “the cause of the most poignant alarm throughout rural England in that year, the people deserting their houses, and spending the night in prayer in the fields, churches and chapels.”
Supporting “evidence” for an apocalypse in 1881 came from an unlikely source: the Great Pyramid of Giza. Charles Piazzi Smyth, the Astronomer Royal for Scotland, became convinced that the pyramid had been built not by the Egyptians but by an Old Testament patriarch (perhaps Noah) under divine guidance. As such, Smyth saw theological implications in just about every measurement of the Great Pyramid, including a calculation for the End of Days.
Smyth’s research was satirized in a January 5, 1881, column in the New York Times: “In the great gallery of the pyramid… there are precisely eighteen hundred and eighty-one notches… hence if the pyramid is trustworthy and really knows its business, we have arrived at the last year of the earth. There are a vast number of people who believe in this remarkable theory of the pyramid, and they are one and all perfectly sure that the pyramid cannot tell a lie… in case they should happen to be disappointed and to be under the unpleasant necessity of making New Year’s calls in the snow on the First of January 1882, they will probably blaspheme the pyramid and lose all faith in man and stones.”
7. Beware of Halley’s Comet
Comets have long been viewed as portents of doom—and the reappearance of Halley’s comet in 1910 was no exception. Early that year, British and Irish writers opined that the comet was a harbinger of a forthcoming invasion by Germany. Some Parisians blamed the comet for a massive flood of the Seine River that devastated their city.
But full-fledged panic would erupt when Chicago’s Yerkes Observatory announced in February 1910 that it had detected a poisonous gas called cyanogen in Halley’s tail. The New York Times reported that the noted French astronomer, Camille Flammarion believed the gas “would impregnate that atmosphere and possibly snuff out all life on the planet.”
Most scientists sought to reassure the public. The famed astronomer Percival Lowell explained that the gases making up Halley’s tail were “so rarefied as to be thinner than any vacuum.”
But the damage had already been done. People rushed to purchase gas masks and “comet pills.” The New York Times reported that “terror occasioned by the near approach of Halley’s comet has seized hold of a large part of the population of Chicago.” Likewise, the Atlanta Constitution reported that people in Georgia were preparing safe rooms and covering even keyholes with paper. (One man, the paper said, had “armed himself with a gallon of whiskey” and requested that friends lower him to the bottom of a dry well, 40 feet deep.)
After Halley’s passed by the Earth in May, the Chicago Tribune announced (unnecessarily) “We’re Still Here.” Not everyone, however, was caught up in the apocalyptic frenzy. Rooftop “comet parties” were all the rage in cities throughout the United States.
8. Planets Align, Nothing Happens
In 1974, John Gribbin and Stephen Plagemann wrote a best-selling book, The Jupiter Effect, warning that in March 1982, an alignment of the major planets on the same side of the Sun would trigger a series of cosmic events - culminating in an earthquake along the San Andreas fault that would wipe out Los Angeles.
The book had an aura of credibility, since both authors were Cambridge-educated astrophysicists and Gribbin was an editor at the prestigious science magazine Nature. The scientists claimed that the combined gravitational force of the planets (especially dense ones, such as Jupiter and Saturn) would exert tidal forces on the Sun, causing an increase in sunspot activity that would douse the earth with high-speed particles, which, in turn, would cause abrupt changes to our planet’s rotation, leading to earthquakes.
Several scientists criticized The Jupiter Effect, saying its argument was based on a tissue-thin chain of suppositions. (Seismologist Charles Richter of Caltech called the thesis “pure astrology in disguise.”) Still, the book spooked people worldwide—thanks, in part, to the endorsement of other doomsayers such as Hal Lindsey (author of the best-selling 1970s book, The Late Great Planet Earth) who, in 1980, wrote that earthquakes across the planet would trigger meltdowns at nuclear power plants and would smash dams, causing massive floods.
As the dreaded date approached, panicked city residents bombarded Los Angeles’ Griffith Observatory with phone calls. Elsewhere, the San Diego Vista Press reported on March 10, 1982: “We've literally had people ask, ‘Should I sell my house and move away?’ said Kevin Atkins of Gates Planetarium [in Denver, Colorado]… One small Christian sect in the Philippines is building a maze of padded cubicles and trying out padded suits in readiness for disasters.” Even Beijing’s newspaper, The People’s Daily, sought to assure readers that “there is no regular cause-effect relation at all between this astronomical phenomenon and natural disasters like earthquakes.”
One year after the non-doomsday event, Gribbin and Plagemann published The Jupiter Effect Reconsidered. It was also a best-seller.
9. The Y2K Panic
At least during this apocalyptic scare, there was someone to blame: Over the decades, computer programmers had used two, rather than four digits, to represent years. As such, computers would allegedly go haywire on January 1, 2000, since the dumb machines would not be able to make sense of the year “00”—and thus the dreaded “Y2K Bug” was born. Some pundits defended the programmers, noting that their actions had been a logical way to conserve precious computer memory and save money. Others were less flattering. “What led to the Y2K Bug was not arrogant indifference to the future,” wrote Brian Haynes in The Sciences Magazine. “On the contrary, it was an excess of modesty. (‘No way my code will still be running 30 years out.’) The programmers could not envision that their hurried hacks and kludges would become the next generation’s ‘legacy systems.’” A September 1999 poll conducted by the Wall Street Journal found that 9 percent of Americans believed Microsoft was hiding the solution to the problem.
The Independent newspaper warned of possible “nuclear war,” caused by glitches in early-warning systems; the International Monetary Fund predicted economic chaos in developing nations; Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan worried that panic over the Bug would prompt U.S. businesses to stockpile goods, leading to widespread shortages, and CNN reported that the U.S. milk supply would dry up because dairy farm equipment might malfunction.
Still, panic over the Y2K Bug never quite reached the fever pitch that many anticipated. A Gallup Poll reported that by mid-December 1999, only 3 percent of Americans anticipated “major problems,” compared with 34 percent the year before.
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Comments (46)
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The Assyrian clay tablet quote is more phony than the Book of Abraham; but I got the point anyways.
Posted by MelkerJ on August 30,2012 | 02:59 PM
Reality is an illusion, a persistent one.
The hoax of a Nobel prize for economics, the media in multitude claim exists. Yet there is none.
Science, academic and otherwise, products of imagining.
Posted by Klaas on June 4,2011 | 06:49 PM
Don't forget the riddiculous "population bomb" predictions that said we'd all starve to death by the 1980's. Or, the "global warming " kooks that claimed we would all be consumed by droughts and fires.
Posted by William James on May 31,2011 | 05:20 AM
According to Respectfully Quoted: A Dictionary of Quotations, the Assyrian tablet quote "would seem to be spurious":
http://www.bartleby.com/73/456.html
Posted by Martin on May 29,2011 | 02:23 AM
This is a very short list.
Predictions like this have occupied every culture for as far back as recorded history goes.
The person that commented that only Christians make these end of the world predications really needs to read a little more.
I should also point out that only a small, but quite vocal, minority of Christians believe we are living in the "last days" or that the world is about to end.
Right now in Iran the government is making preparations for the "12th Iman", who will bring world peace. After slaying all the infidels and making Islam the world's only religion.
This a nation's government doing this, not some televangelist or a radio preacher.
This is infinity more scary than what happened (or didn't happen) on May 21st.
Posted by smg45acp on May 29,2011 | 02:06 AM
How many people wanted to "write books" around 2800 BC when clay tables apparently were the medium of the day? That line can't be from that time period.
Posted by _aleph_ on May 27,2011 | 04:53 PM
You know, I'm not convinced that the Assyrian Tablet is real and not a story that gained popular currency. Can you provide a reliable reference for it?
Posted by John K on May 24,2011 | 03:15 AM
There may be as many stories of the origin of the Shakers(United Society of Believers in Christ's Second Appearing)as of assorted ARMAGEDDON. Here is mine:
Anne Lee (Mother Anne), born in the mid 18th century in England, was a divorced mother of two who immigrated, with her small flock which included her former husband, to New York NY and hence to Albany and Niskayuna. Religious revival did award her a large number of followers throughout New England and west to Kentucky and Ohio. This was more than a century after William Penn and George Fox. Anne Lee, soon to be Mother Anne, was 'The Second Coming, this time in female form.' Eventually we would all be converted. The Shakers, you can read their fascinating history elsewhere, prospered for more than a century.
Posted by Carlton Perry on May 22,2011 | 11:19 AM
Its pretty much only the Christians that spout this end of the world garbage. Truth be told, I think they actually WANT the world to end. Sad.
Posted by Sean on May 21,2011 | 07:47 PM
The comet story reminds me of a story Edgar Allen Poe wrote (The Conversation of Eiros and Charmion) in 1839. It was a dialogue between two departed spirits, one explaining how the world was burned up in an explosion of gases when earth collided with the body of a comet.
Posted by LivelyClamor on May 21,2011 | 03:08 AM
Thanks for this overview!
Posted by Rob Randall on March 6,2011 | 09:58 AM
While I don't think global warming is a scam, neither do I think we can reverse it. It is more natural than man made.
Posted by jonaspell on February 26,2011 | 04:58 PM
I was very much taken with Hal Lindsey's dogmatisms back in the 1970s and early 1980s. He has always insisted--and still insists today--that our generation will live to see the Second Coming of Christ. He takes a futurist interpretation of both the Olivet Discourse (Matt. 24, Mark 13, and Luke 21) and the book of Revelation. In at least two of his books, THE TERMINATION GENERATION, (1976) and THE 1980S: COUNTDOWN TO ARMAGEDDON (1980) that the "Jupiter Effect" would trigger not only earthquakes in many place, but also adverse weather conditions from the sunspots. He claimed that this would be a fullfillment of Jesus's words in the Olivet Discourse about "earthquakes in diverse places." But more than thirty years later, I know better! Jesus's Olivet Discourse was meant only for the disciples of his day, and his predictions were fullfilled within 40 years--a "generation"--in 70 A.D when Jerusalem was sacked by the Roman army and the Jewish temple was destroyed.
Posted by Barbara Rainey on January 3,2011 | 08:01 PM
The world will end. Soon. And all these false predictions have served their purpose, to lull humanity into complacency. The plan has worked perfectly. Sleep my babies, sleep. It comes like a thief in the night - remember that.
Posted by Ron on May 23,2010 | 12:19 AM
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